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The Seance
By: John Mark Green
September 8, 2008
Portly, bearded Professor Geist holds forth to a class of twenty. The clock on the wall registers 8:40. Lance sits in the front row, his eager face aglow. Despite the early hour, he wears coat and tie, in contrast to the half-dressed look of most of the groggy students. Cute Amy, in sweater and skirt, sits near Lance. She too is alert.
In answer to a question, Geist intones “Life beyond the grave? Certainly. Look around you. Everything that is comes from past life. A tree. You yourself. Life begins in decay.”
Beside himself, Lance blurts out “You’re talking biology! But what about the survival of psychic force?”
“Ah, yes. The eternal question: the question of eternity... But we’re not here to talk about the Undead.”
“The supernatural, then. This is a class in religion.”
“I see. You equate religion with the afterlife—with personal immortality.”
“Well, it’s part of it, isn’t it?”
“The Biblical Hebrews had not such belief. Nor do the Hindus.”
No longer able to contain herself, Amy gets involved: “What about reincarnation?”
“But the goal of both Hinduism and Buddhism is Nirvana, the cessation of desire—and of personality.”
The bell rings. Geist continues: “Since you seem so interested, next time we’ll take up the development of the Pharisaic belief in resurrection.”
He drops his books in his briefcase, snaps it shut, and strides out. Students amble out after him. Amy and Lance linger. Amy says, “Wow! I can hardly wait!”
Lance agrees with her tone: “Does religion have to be this scholarly?”
“Dull, you mean. Anyway, what were you expecting, a seance?”
Lance looks at her. Amy reacts to the implications of his look. “You’re kidding!”
“Well, why shouldn’t we? We could try. Maybe work it up for a class report.”
Amy’s eyes brighten. She too sees the possibilities.
*****
Lance and Amy stroll across campus. Lance wonders, “But who’d we summon? The whole point of a seance is to reach someone who’s dead, isn’t it?”
“Well, there’s my Aunt Hildy. My parents have always wondered why she didn’t leave them any money.”
They chuckle.
“I’d rather summon a generous spirit.”
“Tell ya what! C’mon over. My roommate’s a psychic. She’ll have some ideas.”
“A psychic? You’re kidding! You mean, like, reading Tarot cards?”
“She’s a clairvoyante. Claire the clairvoyante!”
“This I gotta see. You mean, right now?”
“You don’t have to.”
“I know... but I want to.”
*****
Chubby Claire, in bathrobe with hair up in rollers, seethes as Amy and Lance enter: “I’m so glad I dressed for company. Otherwise, I might have been caught unaware—or in my underwear.”
Lance tries to pretend he’s somewhere else.
Amy tries to placate Claire: “Sorry, Claire. This is Lance, Maybe you’ll forgive me when you hear why we have to say. It’s about a seance.”
“I think I’d rather be mad... Who taught your religion class, by the way?”
“I told you about that putz Geist, didn’t I? Why do you ask?”
“You guys didn’t go to religion, right? Is there something I should know about?”
“I swear we were both in class... Am I gonna get some support here, Lance?”
“Yeah, I mean, we were both there. What’s the problem, anyway?”
Claire lets out an exasperated sigh. “The problem is that Geist is dead! He was killed last night in an automobile accident.!”
Lance and Amy are stunned. Amy recovers first, recognition dawning...
“Look, Claire, I know you’ve got a gift. And I know can see things. But no matter how clearly you think you saw Professor Geist getting killed in a car crash—“
Claire picks up a newspaper and hands it to Amy. Amy stares uncomprehendingly at it, then sits on the bed.
“Ohmygod!” She shudders and covers her face. Lance takes the paper from her. He sits and slowly reads:
“Last night about 10:30, Doctor Albert Geist, Professor of Religious Studies at Sunnyvale University, was fatally injured when his car leaped the median strip on Tyndale Boulevard. Police speculated that Geist lost control of his car while heading east. Doctor Geist apparently died instantly. Paramedic efforst to revive him proved futile... “
Claire looks smug, but sits down beside Amy, who sobs uncontrollably. “It’s okay, Amy. We’ll get to the bottom of this.” She turns to Lance, “Now do you mind telling me where you two really were? I promise I’ll never tell.”
*****
Claire, Amy, and Lance sit nursing coffees in the Kampus Korner snack shop. Lance’s tie hangs loose; Claire munches on a doughnut. The three of them look grim. Lance says in a flat voice: “There were twenty students there. They all saw him.”
“Okay, okay. I believe you.”
Amy slowly shakes her head. “This is so weird.”
Lance nods, but says, “It’s beyond weird. It’s—“
Claire disagrees. “Not really. The dead need recognition too.”
Amy smiles a rueful smile. “I think we’ve already had our seance.”
“I believe you, but no one else will. Even if all twenty swear on a stack of bibles.”
Lance reflects a moment. “You know what’s funny? Geist’s lecture consisted in the denial of an afterlife. So how does this play—a guy comes back from the dead to tell us there’s no afterlife? That makes no sense.”
Amy’s eyes grow wide. “Wait! I bet—I bet he didn’t know he was dead!”
Claire nods, but Lance just looks at her. “Huh?”
Amy continues, “Yeah, sure! Like Bruce Willis in Sixth Sense. It’s like Geist didn’t come back; he just never left. Force of habit, like.”
Lance shakes his head. “That’s crazy.”
But Claire agrees with Amy: “Maybe not. Psychic force is very, very strong.”
They drink their coffee, not looking at each other.
Amy wonders aloud, “So what do we do now?”
Lance shrugs. “What can we do?”
But Claire smiles. “Remind me why you guys came to see me.”
Amy looks at Claire. “The seance!”
Lance is dubious. “You’re kidding!”
But Amy simply asks “When?”
“In Geist’s office. Where else?”
“But how do we get in?”
Claire takes out a credit card and holds it up. The others nod.
*****
That night, standing in front of Geist’s office, Lance tentatively tries the knob. “Won’t hurt to try—“
The door opens! Lance springs back. “Jesus!”
Amy observes, “It’s like we were expected.”
Lance turns to her. “Don’t say that!”
But Claire says its a good sign. She enters. Amy follows, and Lance scoots in behind them. Claire closes the door. The office is now lit only by light filtering in through the opaque glass panel in the door.
Lance sits in Geist’s chair, and intones a la Geist, “That last paper of your on reincarnation, Amy—pure bunk!”
She doesn’t respond. “Aren’t we forgetting why we’re here?”
Amy and Claire pull up two chairs. Claire is businesslike: “Okay, let’s get on with it.” She takes Amy’s hand in her left hand, and Lance’s in her right.
A little spooked, Lance tries to lighten the situation: “W forgot the Ouija board!” But Claire shushes him.
She closes her eyes and takes three deep breaths. Amy closes her eyes. Lance studies them both.
Claire throws her head back. A wind blows through the office, scattering papers. Amy and Lance jump up, then sit down and look at Claire. A moment later, a voice resembling Geist’s, but in a deeper register, emanates from Claire. Amy and Lance jump again.
“Scared you, didn’t I?”
Amy quavers, “Is that you, Professor?”
The voice lets out a shriek. Amy and Lance do their jump.
Exasperated, Claire remonstrates, “Stop with the games, Professor! Where are you?”
An apparition appears, a ghostly figure in armor. The voice is still deeper. “I could a tale unfold lightest word/ Would freeze thy young blood,/ Make they two eyes start from their spheres...”
Claire sneers, “Hamlet. You’re playing with us, aren’t you, Professor?”
Amy throws her head back. The voice now emanates from her. “It is you who play with me.”
Claire reminds him, “You’re dead, you know.”
The voice is not disembodies, free-floating: “That’s unkind. The most unkindest cut of all.”
Now it is Amy who remonstrates, “Is that all you can do—quote literature?”
“I’m a teacher. Truth is in the texts.”
Finally, Lance pipes up: “Did you hear what Claire said. You’re dead.”
“It takes some getting used to.”
“No more practical jokes, like the one this morning?”
“It’s no fun being dead. So why not let me have a moment of enjoyment. Don’t worry, I’ll gradually fade away.”
Lance is curious: “Doctor Geist, how did you pull off that thing this morning?”
“I have no idea. But I think I’ll become like the wind. Maybe blow the hat off some old prof’s head... maybe blow some girl’s skirt up a little.” He chuckles.
Amy is shocked. “Professor!”
“Oh, I imagine that desire will desert me in time too.”
Lance is impatient. “You’re not telling us what we want to know.”
“How can I? When I don’t know myself?”
“But your being here demonstrates spiritual survival.
“I’m afraid not. Only that life is a hard habit to break.”... But now I must leave.” The voice fades. “Adieu, Adieu! Remember me!”
A gentle wind blows, just lifting the corners of papers on the desk. The students release their hands and shake their heads. Lance says, “A ham to the end!”
*****
A warm September day. Amy and Lance sit on the grass, soaking up the last rays of summer. Lance wears a polo shirt. Both are in shorts. Lance says, “We’re no wiser than we were before.”
“Geist doesn’t seem to know either.”
“I bet he’s feeling his way toward the Other Side.”
“The Other Side? You mean, like, Heaven?”
“Whatever... What do you suppose he meant, Truth is in the texts?”
The Bible? The Koran? The Upanishads? Anyway, I think truth is in experience.”
“But don’t the texts broaden our experience? Anyway, I think the new religion teacher’s an improvement.”
“Why? Just because she looks like Catherine Zeta-Jones?”
“I just hope she’s a careful driver. Anyway, her legs are not as nice as yours.”
Amy smiles. “Lance! You’re as bad as Geist!”
“Yeah, but I’m alive.”
They intertwine hands. As they do, a pretty girl passes by. A breeze springs up, raising her skirt tantalizingly.
Wide-eyed, Amy looks at Lance. “You don’t suppose... “
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